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Big Questions? What’s Your Role? SGLC 2

September 12, 2016

Filed under: Happiness,Leadership,SGLC — Tags: , — Barry @ 10:37 PM

Short Guide to a long career

I hope you are enjoying my new book, A Short Guide to a Long Career, if you haven’t downloaded your free copy, go ahead and do it now.

My last blog post revealed what the book is about: creating a career that provides the dentist with a vehicle to help him or her to thrive and flourish through their years in dentistry, using Dr. Martin Seligman’s Well-Being Theory—PERMA, which stands for:

  1. P-Positive Emotions
  2. E-Engagement
  3. R-Positive Relationships
  4. M-Meaning and Purpose
  5. A- Accomplishment

This past July I had the opportunity to go to the first-ever festival for positive education. I believe I was the only dentist in attendance. I got to meet some of the superstars of this burgeoning new field, including Dr. Martin Seligman himself.

I came away excited about the future of positive education. I truly believe, as Seligman states, we are looking at a “sea change” in education that will help young people to become the very best versions of themselves. I was excited because this is the heart of what I have been writing about for years.

There is no reason that we can’t bring positive psychology principles to dentistry…and medicine.

So excited that I enrolled to get my Certification in Positive Psychology.

But I digress. This blog post is about the most recent tips that were e-mailed to those who have downloaded A Short Guide to a Long Career. I want to discuss Tips 1 and 2 through the lens of PERMA.

The first Tip: Ask Yourself the Big Questions: – Dentists are obsessed with “how” to do things. I’m no different than most – I constantly seek out advice on “how” to do this new procedure or that new technique. The problem is that most of us don’t take the time to answer the bigger questions. Like why we even entered our career (yes, this isn’t restricted to dentistry).

I remember the first amalgam filling I ever did (over forty years ago). I remember how proud I was. So proud that I called my father to tell him. He asked me how long it took – I said two hours. He said, “How are you going to make a living doing that?”

That’s a true story. The problem is that it created a lens through which I looked at my entire career. Until I burned out.

Then I asked the deeper questions—like what is it besides money, that I need to get from dentistry?  I started asking the deeper questions after I was in dentistry for ten years. The answers are still coming.

There are plenty of people in dentistry who seem to have the answers – but it’s the ones who have the best questions that interest me more.

The biggest question for me is, “how can I reconcile the paradox between duty and desire?” To be a wonderful competent dentist and still create a great life. It’s a paradox we all must answer.

Tip 2- Establish Your Role:- Another speaker I heard at the positive psychology meeting was Dr. James Pawelski, the Director of Education at the Positive Psychology Center at University of Pennsylvania. He presented his famous thought experiment that you can see on You Tube if you like – it’s well worth the time.

The thought experiment asks us to consider if we were going to be super-heroes, what color cape would you choose to wear?

The choices are red and green. He tells us that if you choose the red cape then your role starts out as you having the power to fight against the bad things in our world. That’s pretty powerful in itself.

If you choose the green cape you have the power to grow good things in our world.

You must choose as part of the thought experiment. I sat there smiling to myself because as a dentist I thought how this fundamental question means so much to the role we play with our patients.

Either color works, and Pawelski has some advice (hint-reversible cape?).

As I said, it is worth going to YouTube to watch his presentation, but he also claims that the red cape/green cape paradox answers the fundamental principles of positive psychology.

The real question for me is: can I flourish and become the best version of myself (and can my patients?)- if I only wear the red cape and put out fires all day.

Think about it — Tips 1 and 2 are meant to get you thinking about that long career.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Character Matters

July 27, 2015

Filed under: Leadership — Tags: , , , — Barry @ 11:15 AM

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I guess most people know who said, “Speak softly and carry a big stick.”  For those who don’t, the answer is Theodore (Teddy) Roosevelt, arguably one of America’s greatest presidents.

There have been a few in our history…Abe Lincoln comes to mind.

Teddy’s renowned quotation, succinctly says more about character than most famous sayings.

And watching Donald Trump lately, confirms why he will never succeed in becoming president…as a matter of fact I wonder how he ever succeeded at anything…without a little help from his friends.

Character matters.  From Presidents to paperhangers.

Positive psychologists know this.  Martin Seligman PhD, the dean of positive psychology has written extensively on the meaning of virtues and character strengths in developing the “good life.”

His work classifies 6 core virtues into 24 character strengths.  Working with strengths can be a key to a successful life as well as becoming a great leader at any level.

The 6 virtues are:

  1. Wisdom and Knowledge
  2. Courage
  3. Humanity
  4. Transcendence
  5. Temeperance
  6. Justice

When I look at “The Donald” I see a man who is way out of balance.  But then again, no one is perfect.

I don’t think he represents what Teddy meant by carrying a big stick.  It was a metaphor for “presence.”  Polls show that the American people are dissatisfied with our “presence” in the world —not that we should destroy everything in our path.  This isn’t the real estate business.

On the other hand, I think speaking softly says it all.  I hear wisdom, courage, humanity and justice in the quote, don’t you?

One of the reasons I consider myself a moderate is that I believe in the balance.  I learned this along time ago when I first went to the Pankey Institute.

These ideas are not new.  L.D. Pankey studied Aristotle.  The Greek spoke the same language of virtues that Seligman is bringing to life currently.

Sure I learned technical dentistry at the Pankey Institute, but I also learned the principles of being a good professional, which transferred to a “good life.”

The lesson for everyone (Presidents to Paperhangers) is that character matters.

We have problems in this country.  Many of the problems relate to a shift from a moral world to a materialistic world.  In the wake we lost character.

I am beginning to see a trend back to morality with books like David Brooks’ bestseller, The Road to Character.  

Essentially this post is about leadership.  We need leadership at every level.  From the White House to your practice to your house.

When I look back at my own life and practice I see it was the moral lessons that made all the difference.

When I go to vote I will be looking for character strengths and virtues…hopefully everyone else will as well….Goodbye Donald!